Every lil' things about her I remembered deeply in my heart~~
She's my greatest~~
I Love Her Very Much...
I hope she's doing well out there...
In a week times, it will be her death anniversary... 4 years on, I still can't accept the fact that she's gone... She have go to a place very far which I can't call her or see her...
As mentioned on the previous post, that I'll be going to visit granny tomb...
Yes we did it on March 28 2010!
Belated post! My bad! >.<
As I am typing this post, I am sure that I AM MISSING HER... We woke up early last morning at about 4.15am, to get prepare and head down to the tomb for praying...
I only remembered that I visited Granny's tomb for the second time, it's gonna be four years odd that she left me and went to a place with no worries and pains... I could only remembered that sweet moments spend with Granny when she's still around with me... I almost cried when I was there last morning, I clean up Granny's tomb with her picture there and there's a few droplets of tears roll down my cheeks... I guess, loving someone you deeply love is something which called happy-ness...
But I am happy that, Granny is on the other side of the world enjoying her "天伦子路"...
I hope she's well~
I hope she's happy~
I hope she's with her mum/sisters/brother(my late great-granny/grand-aunts/grand-uncles)~
I hope she's still loving us~
I hope she's missing us~
I want NOTHING but HOPE she's happy, that's all I am asking~
There's a song which always remind me about her... But the song is in dialect, but it's meaningful...
TinGz has the feeling of not wanting to go work anymore...
TinGz is feeling tired in her body but her eyes couldn't close when she was lying on the bed... O.o
The randomness leads me to a lil' of mood swing and what-nots, and it's gonna be the month again. Hahs! So love ones, do bear with me for a lil' while alright...
*Sigh*
Apparently, today is another working day for me and I would drag myself to work later in the afternoon as to head off to office first. Imagine when office is only filled with four people working is really very boring but heys, out of the bored, colleagues do crack a few jokes or two. :)
In the mist of mastering the fine art of being busy, I do hope that I'll have time to do what I liked with my besties and bf dearest too. *HuGs* For now, I can't wait for the weekend to arrive because I need some source of retail therapy to kills my stress at work.
Denial, I never knew/know that life would be such a mess when I begin to work again. It's really no life at work... *Cries* Just as I put all this together, I never have the time to have dinner with my family last Friday and wasn't able to go shopping with them. And I kid you not, oldest sister do text me every morning asking me how's work going on and what-nots.
Never mind, me being busy, because I do still have the time to text/call friends/bf... *Hearts* They mean so much to me as they never fail in guiding me through my life, seeing my ups and downs and always bring me back to earth after talking some sense to me. :)
So how to one resist from having loads of besties and of course one and only bf arr... With them around I never felt alone nor felt left out! :P
Constantly, they remind me to be happy in whatever I do in life and of course never failed to give me those support and encouragement whenever I turn to them. :) They watch me grow and Im definitely a wiser girl now! =)
I know... I know... It's been fours days before I last blog over here, and it's now coming to the fourth day of CNY according to the chinese calendar of the month! =) I do hope that everyone's gotten quite a great deal of red packets thus far! :) Any-O-how, my visiting of relatives/friends are over already and it's really very tiring or exhausted even! Anyway, I've digressed. :P
Well, I hasn't got the much urge of this CNY mood because it's time for the irregular month again and that is what I hate the most uhh... *Laughs* I admit, I do throw my anger out for the last few days and the days to come. *Hurhur* I've no idea, why am I feeling real upset deep inside my heart. I guess, it gotta do with my inner side of emotional feelings that has been causing much heaps of problems to me.
Im feeling kinda fuming over myself for no reasons or simply because the PMS mood make me feel fuming. Either way you look at it...!! *Laughs* Somehow, I came by to know that I've somewhat dislike quite a few people in my life, however, Im not going to reveal their names because I wouldn't wanna pin-point at others. I could only say this people are my acquaintances, which somehow, I've save one of their lives. However, people tends to take my kindness for granted, for I also beliefs that they will help me back one day if I needed it. I guess Im wrong in helping them. *Sigh*
Friends of mine always say that Im too good to others till they over climb my head and took things as if they are mend to be. Anyways, I've somehow walk away with a smile plastered on my face. So being fake! *Laughs*
On the side note, there's too much things to beckons for, living each and everyday to the fullest is most important of all. :)
Anyways, I've truckloads to blog I'll tried my best to post the stories soon. :P
Am currently haunting for Bestie Jie's 21st birthday pressie and her birthday is just coming by soon and is this coming Friday and yet I still haven't went to get her a pressie yet. *Cracking my head to think what to get*
*Laughs*
Well, will be going to help the economy tomorrow in wee bits, and heading to town and hopefully will get her something unique and nice uhh. :))) {Self-denial, obviously} *Hurhur*
On the side note, I've heard Bestie Jie telling me that her bf do not have any plans on her 21st birthday. She sms-ed me because she felt real upset over it and I hope that she's feeling much better now. :))) All she wants is having a smashing 21st birthday with her dearest, I guess so, because that's what all girls yearn for from their bfs out there. Hahs!
I ought to know she merely walk away with a smiles, simply because she knows her bf well enough that he won't surprise her insignificantly. However, I hope that she would have a smashing celebration with her friends out there who gotta plan for her on the actual day and that's is looming on this Friday.
Amidst for me, I'll continue to haunt her pressie for her because she's one of my bestie jie ever since I knew her for almost 3years odd when we were back in Starhub. :))) She always being nicest friend cum colleague always helping me in one way or another- be it in life or even the time back in Starhub as she was my Senior. *Hearts*
On a cheerier note, we share the 3 years odd friendship till we get closer each and every time be it in person, e-mail, phone call away, MSN she never made an excuse for her to leave my life and one whom really help me much. Always giving me the most honest opinion whenever Im struck and teaching me which bridges to cross and which bridges to burn. She never fail being a great bestie to me, I ought to know that whenever Im facing a certain problem she will always be there for me no matter how late it is. I once remembered she rang me up in the wee night when I was feeling real down over a certain problems, she help me walk out from the darkness moment and show me the rainbow of life. *Huggies*
I know all this friendship is being calculated for 3years odd and more to come and I Love her through every bits. :)))
For she know that Im always easily get hurt and she will always be there bringing me back to earth. Many credits are given to her and of course those who have help me in one way or another which I may never know. *Woots*
Alright, enough of my craps and what-nots, am feeling kinda hungry because I've had my dinner yet or I should say I had an early dinner at 5pm. Either way you look at it...!! *Laughs*
Am still the blues and of cos it's due to the month that is causing it. =( *SiGh*
Im vexed. :(
Am a sad girlie! *Wry smiles*
She's cries and yearn for a loving life long journey. =D
Am glad that Bestie Jennifer and Evelyn has offer me a listening ear and giving me their most honest opinion and bringing me back to earth again! *Hearts*
On the side note, Im having a bad headache as well. :(
Here's a small lil' birthday wish-list of sorts!
TinGz's Forever Young birthday wish-list:-
- To-die-for a new bag that I've been lusting for months... And hope the bag will last uhh...
- I need a new pair of spectacle, which I've ask from my dearest mummy! I told her that both my white and silver spectacles is getting blur which means the degree has increased! I've been complaining to her I cant see very well and I might go blind! (Especially, my left eye as I've knock onto something one month back and it really hibernating having to see the double vision! *Sigh* I hope dearest mummy will get me one. =) As, this is the very FIRST time I've dearest mummy to buy me a new spectacle, for the rest of the spectacle are sponsor by myself lahx! Hahs!
(Noted: Dearest mummy has brought me a RED colour spec yesterday and I love it very much, however I gotta wait till the colour arrive. And it costs dearest mummy 200 hundred dollars and that's the second expensive glasses I've gotten.)
- SHOPPING VOUCHERS!! Mango, Forever 21, Topshop, Dorothy Perkins, VNC, or even Charles and Keith, CK Tangs, Takashimaya, Isetan, BHG (Formerly known as Seiyu)...You name it, I want it...! *Laughs*
- Unlimited credit for online SHOPPING on my fave websites!(To-die-for accessories,clothes and bags...!) The list goes on... :P
-A wallet that doesn't have double flaps... =P Too much to beckons... I want it in BLACK color! It'll be nice if that's from The Wallet Shop! There's one wallet that's catching my eyes!! T_T
-That watch from adidas / Fossil/ Casio sound great too... =)
- The Samsung U3 mp3 in PINK please! (hint hint: sitex show coming up) Its so pretty..! I mean, my Creative 4GB player's doing fine...But how can one resist such a slim,functions-packed, to die-for mp3 player?! No Apples please! Im never an Apple fan! *Laughs* The only downside is the charging - via USB? Oh well, The accessories are so pretty!! *Loves* But, it's to be purchased separately...! Darns! =(
- A bigger wardrobe that can place all my clothing's, seriously I've too much of clothing hanging around the house and it look like some bazaar or pasar malam!! * Laughs*
- I want a splendid celebration with someone I loved! Surprise!! (begging onto the surprise) *hur hur*
-A new charm bracelet would be nice! ;P
-More accessories! =P
-More bags!
- Health, wealth and smiles for everyone around me! =)
- A PINK cake! *Laughs*
But TinGz reckons that she'd be getting loads of accessories from friends again! Well, I guess that's the safest present to give a friend when you dont know what to get her! *Laughs*
All I want is to have a smashing birthday...Cos I seriously think that I didnt had really memorable and enjoyable birthday celebrations in the past...My 16th was, in my friends' words, "pathetic", "lousy", "horrid" (Blah blah blah...They didnt really have nicesties to say... *Laughs* ) cos all my friends were having awesomely huge parties and I didn't even have a cake! Not even a slice...! *Laughs* (However I manage to get an memorable 18th bday last year, and of cos with an Ice-cream cake from my friends that we celebrated at marina sqaure parris..)
Well, to be honest, this is just a wish-list... Its the thought that counts...Really! =)
And I know of truckloads of people that have the intention of getting me un-glamorously smash by cake...! *Laughs*
11 More days to my forever young birthday=D
And wait for my Christmas wish list to be posted out. Check this page back again.
And I guess those people who come by to read my blog didnt get any hot and crispy news... *Woots*
Im back to updates some stories here. =)
Apparently, I've been feeling the blues for quite sometimes, and Im really vexed with all those problems. All I could say is, I've learnt to see further one step in life. Being happy is all I want. :)
Yayy, yesterday I went tampines mall singtel to re-con my mobile service and finally my dad brought me the mobile phone that I wanted, and that is no other then Sony Ericsson K770i. Im contented with it. I've fall in love with my K770i. =) *Hearts*
Life is so amazing in such a way that there would be times when you're kind of looking for something and that you'd think you know you're correct about something, yet subconsciously, your mind tells you the polar opposite...Perhaps its a hunch, or the intuitive sixth sense, or instinct, I cannot pin-point the exact word to describe it; Yet sometimes, your gut feeling tells you that you're correct, yet sometimes, it might just be that one is thinking too much of stuff...
I cannot help it that I am a natural pessimist that sees the glass as being half full, and that I am a natural worrier... Or maybe its got to do with the fact that I always try my best, be it for friends, or for issues in life, so much so when it all falls apart, I get disappointed and I try to protect myself even more, for I am fearful of getting hurt once more. But with each setback I have experienced, the experiences have made me much stronger than I have never imagined possible.
Likewise, in this case, I have made decisions, and with each passing day I know that it's been a long road discovering things about myself and of other issues that really matter to me. It has been an eye-opener, for I really have no absolute idea where I found the intrinsic strength to bounce back into the game of Life, and even helped out my dearest friends who are going through relationship problems recently.
I guess the setbacks that I have experienced along the way have made me become stronger, and more aware of issues around me. Of course there are the lovely friends whose talks and chats with me made so much sense and that they have indirectly helped answered the questions that I probably had all along, but didn't seem to have the correct answers, or that I was just simply afraid of knowing the truth and answers, cos I knew I was instinctively correct... Their encouragements and advices did contribute to me becoming stronger... I am just surprised at how quickly I have adapted and stood up to the challenges that were waiting for me...! =)
Like in this rainy season, where when the rain and stormy weather clears, there would be clear blue skies ahead! And I now am beginning to see that clear blue skies, and even the rainbow ahead of me! =) Granted that there would be times when there might be rainy and stormy skies again, but come what may, I hope that I can make it through each shower there is and become a much stronger, better and happier person! =)
Im no longer the silly/foolish/stupid Tingz I use to be... Now Im a firm and direct Tingz... =) Never will I hide myself inside my lil' hole... Hahs!
Note: It's 15 more days to my forever young birthday!=D
Yayy, I've been into blogging for 9months odd!=) *Woots* Most credit are credited to those who has been loyal in popping by and coming by to read my blog about my life updates and what-nots.
Am totally hooked onto blogger:) I'll never been able to be a happy girlie until I've found blogging as one of my hobbies. *Evil Laughs* Many dearies friends of mine, has been always here reading my blogs to keep updated with my news uhh.
Time has flown by me..!!
It's been 9months since I started to blog on April 2007 until today Im still blogging happily. =D Well, 9months has pass and the year of 2007 will be officially be ended very very soon. I admit, during this year alone many unhappy stuff occurs and what- nots...
And I've finally get what I want in my life and Im gonna walk towards my goals and dreams. =) Admist, there are much dearies friends who have been with me through my 201 post and they have always offer me a hand in help whenever I needed and often bringing me back to earth, when Im facing some troubles in life. I sincerely appreciate what they have done for me. I *hearts* you all. :P
Alright=)
Frankly speaking, Im feeling kinda sleepy at this moment and I've no idea what happen to me. Maybe there's too much crocks ups happen here and there which Im unable to reveal over here just to protect myself. *Wry smiles*
I hope that problems can be solve, and yet I know that I cant help much in whatever my family is facing all I could do was to sit down here and keeping silence because I dont want those arrows skiving back shooting at me instead! *Sigh*
Add to the fact, it's raining and Im seriously real sleepy and on the other note, Im feeling ridiculously hungry too! *Feigns smiles*
Isnt nice to hide under your blanket and go into a pool of sweet dreams! *Snore snore snore*
Anyways, I've truckloads to blog but Im struck! Hahs!
Reason being- Braincells are tired and they couldnt be functioning well. *Feigns mock horror*
Time for me to rest and get some bites! *Woots*
Note: It's 20 more days to my forever young birthday=D
Im still having problems with my connection to the Internet (Bloody Singnet!) and its getting to be a lil' tad more than irritating when I'm online via MSN and my friends keep saying Im popping in and out of MSN far too often! *Laughs* What's more, all the websites that I surf either takes donkey ages to load, or it never loads! =(
When you're feeling ridiculously bored at home I couldnt help by having asking DarLinG Alice out for a coffee session at my house! *Sly smiles*
And yesh, we were gossiping or I should say that we are having a heart to heart talk and sharing our stories...
Yea, intentionally Im feel to meet up her after my school days!! =)
Im glad that she didnt blame me for being so busy since Im blissfully attached!
She's a best buddy that I ever had, I use to remember that she has always be here seeing me through my ups and downs and guiding me along my journey. She never fail to lend in her ears whenever I need it. I *Hearts* you!
Down to earth...
For the families and friends of the 5 young men who perished in the choppy waters of Cambodia...
Although I might not know you guys as individuals nor friends, and I've only read about you through the snippets of information via the newspapers, all I wanna say is that I can only offer my condolences, and that although Life was cruelly robbed away from the 5 of you; What matter is that you all have lead your life to the fullest, however short the life was...
5 families have been robbed of a young son, a brother, a loved one; all promising and filled with zest for life, and you all sacrificed while doing a sport that you enjoyed and liked. I take a moment's worth of silence, and I am sure that Singapore is mourning. May such incidents never happen in the sports fraternity again.
My condolences to the families, and for those whom survived the tragedies of such a terrible accident - Keep those chins and paddle oars high up, for I am sure that your friends whom are no longer with you would want you guys to keep that fighting spirit going!
A moment of silence, and it's really at times like these that you realised the fragility of Life; and the unpredictables of Life itself.
It's been rainy and breezy the past few days, and it being rainy means that I can either sleep like a log (Christmas log! It's 34 days to my Birthday and Christmas!) cos it's so cooling and un-stuffy at nights.
It's raining, and I've found myself unable to have my afternoon nap as Im currently having a very bad headache that has been lasting for days or so... Isn't very glam to be during exam period. Im feeling rather woozy and this headache has causing much inconvenience to me.
While I was trying real hard in mugging my notes, my head hurts badly its just like many stuff that is hitting my head. I ignore it fo days, and it got worst, and Im feeling quite blur now. =( Am feeling very cold, am shivering in much! -_-
I hope that I'll faint, as Im all alone at home in the huge house! *Sigh*
On the sidenotes, I wish that there will be someone nice to here with me listening to all my worries and what-nots. Indeed Im glad that dearies friends always made their way here to text/call me up. I guess most credits are give to them. And I kid you not, bestie Jie AKA Evelyn has always compliment on my level of patience in many situation-work(last time), school, relationship, family and so on. Well, my level of patience is excellent! =) *Woots*
Apparently, I guess no point been to encroaching and having those think too much illusions. If Im not in da good mood, I will choice to keep it to myself rather than to share it. Because I guess no point, as people wont understand what Im feeling now. *no worries babes, Im ok*
At this moment of time, Im feeling kinda lost in many areas, I cant pin point exactly on what happen but I guess all I need is to follow what my heart says. I remember that there is a nicetest friend who always keep telling me "focus on what's more important". I totally agree with what he/she says to me, I may heed his/her advice. Because he/she is always my advicer and my bestie in many ways. =)
Im feeling kinda sentimental!
*Sigh*
Too many unanswered questions that are left in me and too much loads in me which I hasnt been throw it away.
Life is so amazing in such a way that there would be times when you're kind of looking for something and that you'd think you know you're correct about something, yet subconsciously, your mind tells you the polar opposite...Perhaps its a hunch, or the intuitive sixth sense, or instinct, I cannot pin-point the exact word to describe it; Yet sometimes, your gut feeling tells you that you're correct, yet sometimes, it might just be that one is thinking too much of stuff...
Perhaps I need a conversation with one of my bestie later! Because some of my bestie always bring me back to earth whenever Im real down because truth enough they have always been there see me crossing the most difficult bridges and never fail lending me a hand to rely on.
I guess there's really too much uncertainties in my life journey.
Frankly speaking Im feeling very good in moodwise, deep inside my heart I could only hide those worries to myself and of course sharing it with my bestie Jie AKA Evelyn. I text her with my worries and she replied me" think things on the bright side. No point making one unhappy. It doesnt feel good at all. Sometimes have to make sacrifices for loved ones."
Im glad that she never fail in giving me advice and listening to me. I cannot help it that I am a natural pessimist that sees the glass as being half full, and that I am a natural worrier... Or maybe its got to do with the fact that I always try my best, be it for friends, or for issues in life, so much so when it all falls apart, I get disappointed and I try to protect myself even more, for I am fearful of getting sad at times. But with each setback I have experienced, the experiences have made me much stronger than I have never imagined possible.
Likewise, in this case, I have made decisions, and with each passing day I know that it's been a long road discovering things about myself and of other issues that really matter to me. It has been an eye-opener, for I really have no absolute idea where I found the intrinsic strength to bounce back into the game of Life.
I guess the setbacks that I have experienced along the way have made me become stronger, and more aware of issues around me. Of course there are the lovely friends whose talks and chats with me made so much sense and that they have indirectly helped answered the questions that I probably had all along, but didn't seem to have the correct answers, or that I was just simply afraid of knowing the truth and answers, cos I knew I was instinctively correct... Their encouragements and advices did contribute to me becoming stronger... I am just surprised at how quickly I have adapted and stood up to the challenges that were waiting for me...! =)
Like in this rainy season, where when the rain and stormy weather clears, there would be clear blue skies ahead! And I now am beginning to see that clear blue skies, and even the rainbow ahead of me! =) Granted that there would be times when there might be rainy and stormy skies again, but come what may, I hope that I can make it through each shower there is and become a much stronger, better and happier person! =)
The greatest things I felt is I do really have nice friends always be there ready for me and truth enough they often paused for awhile to let me vent my worries and never fail to bring a smile back on my face! =)
Thank you, to all my lovely darLinGs! Thank you for listening, for having an open heart, for not judging, for being honest, for your encouragements and for helping and wanting me to become better! I*HeaRt* you all! =)
This is going to an special post that I longing to post since "problems vs the emotional side" of me and one of my bestie Jie AKA Evelyn.
Well, sometimes I felt that most problems/emotional feelings happens when something real bad happen. It could be not our fault, and it could be the other party in blame. As I mentioned before, guys sometimes need their own space to be a free bird, but having granting them too much of it will mislead to those quarrels and what-nots. However, girls being girls, will often paused for awhile to be there for their lovely boyfriend and sometime even go that extra mile in helping them with their stuff.
And this bestie Jie AKA Evelyn of mine, being the nicetest girlfriend she would do any thing to accommodated her boyfriend, however I guess her boyfriend has been really taking her presence for granted and she always need to be there for him and choices were never hers. It's always his way, his choices and NEVER hers. Guys, please dont treat your girlfriend this way because it will cause them to feel very emotional and they will tends to think and worry a lot. I guess, no one like to be treat like an rag doll, even me!
Bestie Jie AKA Evelyn sensed it when he suddenly became distant, but she feared mentioning it to him, for she didn't wanna wreck what they had by going into another senseless argument. She did try to probe, but he became somewhat angry; so she didn't dare to bring the issue up again. She just thought that he were just tired and stressed out from work. And when she did try to resolve the conflict/issues-at-hand, nothing was resolved, and he grew to become more distant from her.
She do admit that there were nights when she lie awake, thinking what had gone wrong, there were the tears of frustration and anger, for she was angry that she had allowed 2 persons very much in love to become the state that they are in - They were in love, but cracks were appearing, and they were so cordial and distant to each other. She, being the happy-go-lucky and silly girl that she am, had thought that Love would conquer all... But she failed to stop and evaluate things from another perspective; That perhaps he were so drained out by her and she antics that he didn't know how to handle or what to do anymore.
On top of that, he had pressures at home and at work. She wanted so much for him to be more ambitious, for he said work was no longer enjoyable and he were often bogged down by work.
Im currently feeling quite upset over this issue that my bestie jie AKA Evelyn is suffering. Well, Im not an profound person in many areas, but I've learnt for my past experiences in relationship so I wish to a lil' note to everyone who is reading/visiting my lovely blog! =)
Granted there are the regrets, the laments, the "should haves", "could haves" and "would haves"... But like what I used to tell people that needed my listening ear - There is much more to life than the "should haves", "could haves" and "would haves", and in my case, I think that it does apply - Admittingly, there would have been a lot of things I would and wouldn't do had I known the outcome, but it wouldn't have brought me to where I am today, and I can definitely say that it has made me grown up in certain ways, and TinGz would become a better person for her ownself; and that there isn't a party whose right or wrong in the relationship, for it takes two and whole lotta patience and understanding for things to work!
To me, if I ever encounter a problem in my relationship I would try to find sometime talking to him and getting back all things right again. I know sometimes Im very unreasonable, however my unreasonable action will show that I care. However I know isn't right to through anger on your partner. But me being silly will always stay up all the way up just to have an sms from him, which I feel in some way Im kinda silly. After heaps of conversation in it, I've conclude in my mind; that just let things sail by itself and not to be too encroaching, and I always believe in a day of 24hours there isnt a thing called "not free". Even it will take hours to received an sms/call I'll just wait. After much saying, Im feeling tired of repeating myself, so I'll just let things fall in together in the way they are mend to be.
Admittingly, it has make me stop wondering and pondering of those problems, yet sometimes the very down side of me is getting very emotional very quickly. And it can tell by all this; a phone call; "hello busy huh?"; replied yea call you later; then I'll hang down without saying Good-bye!
I don't know about others but to me, if I keep on having heard this I'll feel very frustrated and fed up; that will lead to an cellphone switch off or silent! I admit, I ever did do that alright! Because Im feeling very upset, due to can't I even talk to you for just 5 lovely minutes? I know, if you're very busy at least show up after the busy moment. And all I gotta do is wait, and I kid you not, TinGz waiting patience is getting much more excellent and is reaching the to hill!
Nothing I have, but an excellent patience! *opps self-denial*
Apparently, I might not help out much with the problems that bestie Jie AKA Evelyn is facing, however I've always urge her not to think so much when you're in a relationship, because being blissfully attached can be sweet and sour at times; there's pros and cons in it. However, it only take you to a step in another life learning, why do we keep having much mistakes in life;because when you have mistakes in life and you learn from it we will never run outta lesson!
Apparently, by having the "thinking too much" illusion isn't pleasant at all, so I hope that bestie Jie AKA Evelyn will heed my advice and paused for while if you're feeling tired in life. Sometimes, by pausing a while does helps and it'll do some self-reflection on why all this are happening. *Wry smiles*
I'm here today because I've learnt my mistakes in life and never repeat again; because there's always a reason in life like having able to see the lovely smiles daily. Much sufficient, that people tends to take things for granted and they'll only realise it when such happiness slips away. =)
Relationship taught me so much - patience, honesty, caring, understanding and most importantly, how to love another unconditionally.
Bestie Jie AKA Evelyn and I had a long conversation the other day, and I merely told her -
"Love would find a way. Indifference would only find excuses."
Sometimes we win, and sometimes we lose, that is Life, and it is undeniable.
Sometimes love just ain''t enough
I don''t wanna lose you, I don''t wanna use you just to have sombody by my side And I don''t wanna hate you I don''t wanna take you But I don''t wanna be the one to cry That don''t really matter to anyone, anymore But like a fool I keep losing my place And I keep seeing you walk through that door
But there''s a danger in loving somebody too much And its sad when you know it''s your heart you can''t trust There''s a reason why people don''t stay where they are Baby sometimes love just ain''t enough
Now I could never change you I don''t wanna blame you Baby you don''t have to take the fall Yes I may have hurt you But I did not desert you Maybe I just want to have it all It makes a sound like thunder It makes me feel like rain And like a fool who will never see the truth I keep thinking something''s gonna change
But there''s a danger in loving somebody too much And its sad when you know it''s your heart you can''t trust There''s a reason why people don''t stay where they are Baby sometimes love just ain''t enough
And there''s no way home when it''s late at night and you''re all alone Are there things that you wanted to say Do you feel me beside you in your bed there beside you where I used to lay
And there''s a Danger in Loving somebody too much And it''s sad when you know it''s your heart they can''t touch There''s a reason why people don''t stay who they are Cause baby sometimes love just ain''t enough Baby sometimes love just ain''t enough
Its amazing what a random thoughts, or shall I call that" more problems kinda situation" does to the brain... I had to shower, so I dragged myself outta bed, and before I knew it.... The problems didnt stop...
OR
It's amazing how time whizzes us by and before I had time to stop, smell the roses or whatsoever...
It's been many days...
Uncountable days till my last breath...
Time has really flown me by...
Im currently feeling a lil' vexed with loads of stuff be it personal or non- personal... Im simply feeling very fuck up... =( I had been a lil' vexed for almost the entire day. I can't exactly pin-point an exact reason for it, but maybe its just that I sometimes feel grossly misunderstood, by a lot of people. I mean, close friends and family members usually know my what I am trying to get at most of the time, and amazingly, the mood that I am in either by just the tone of voice I use or by the words I type on MSN -- you guys know who you are! :)
I guess endings always have the writings on the wall even before anyone says/initiates anything, and in this case, problems or grossly misunderstanding. I guess it has to do with the very fact of having a person whom you loved/cared and whom are very significant in your life, can get mundane, so much so that people often take the daily little things for granted. I admit that I have been guilty of being unreasonable however, I didn't take anyone for granted; but I would have never expected things to be so cranky pretty recently, for I had always thought that he'd be the knight of my fairytale, the one whom will share the white Pickett fences dream with.
{Note: Be it schoolmates, classmates, dearies friends and love ones, I never want things to go wayy cranky...}
I've learnt it- because of the group project all those members I cared for are now totally out of my sight...
Im actually feeling kinda vexed at this moment in my life...I dont know what I ought to do with my life... *SiGh*
So many dreams i aspire, So many things i desire, But many thoughts are the stumbling blocks...
Maybe I ought to head out to the beach more often to clear my thoughts...
"seriously TinGz.. sometimes... make decisions on your own... dun hv to keep doing wat others want u to... the old TinGz i noe has a mind of her own..."
On the sidenote, there's few random thoughts came across my mind, thinking of the past and the current Im feeling rather emotional... The love I had last time couldn't compare to the love I have now... Because there's two very important person who was in my life but how they are gone and have went to heaven... Yea, Im talking about my paternal grandmother and paternal great-grandmother... They are the two loves ones who shared my joys and sorrow together and often falter me with a hug when I always beckons... I salute them...
[My dearest "ah ma"(grandma) and "tai ma"(great-grandmother) I miss you all a lot, I hoped that no matter where are you all you all will continue to protect your grandchildren and great-grandchildren and be the reason of our daily smiles]
During my most "upset moments", Im happy that there'll always be a few sweet dearies who will text/call me up... I give them most credit... *Hearts* I guess how am Im feeling right now only two dearies will understand that's no other then Darlingg Jennifer and Evelyn... Yayy, they've always been here with me and give me the most honest opinion... *Sly smiles*
For some weird/morbid reasons, sometimes it really tears me down whenever I think of the past and the current... Yea, some will heed my advice but others will like wavy off my advice and be the way they wanted and Im seriously washing off my hands off of all school stuff... (Im saying this to all my projects members) no offend to others...
Technically, I hope that things will goes smooth of me and everyone of there... Blogging this down, makes me feel real very emotional, yes I ought to know that I'm still putting smiles on my face but deep down inside my heart I'm feeling weak. I hope that I could just sleep through all those problems that are occurring next week. I admit, from next week onwards will be a real stressful and tedious week till the end of my course. But never the less, there's friends who will just clown around and act all silly and goofy to make me smile...*Wrinks* I'm emboldened by all my dearies friends... ^^
It's really alarming hours...
I know, allowing others to have their own freedom and space will be better and therefore, I do not want to became a sad girlie I use to be.... And I admit, I have taste those bitterness life- be it school, family, relationship and what-nots... I know, I must not be too encroaching... I guess what the ending now will be, less wary and just focus on what's more important...
So in a way, after I've come to realize the pros and cons of being single and the pros and cons of being in a relationship with a significant somebody...
Either way you look at it...!!! *Wry smiles*
Is wrong being too concern over dearies friends/boyfriend??
Let time prove everything to me...
I guess only those dearies friends who knows me well, will get what I mean and Im a girl who is asking for simplicity...
Simplicity is virtue...!!!
Im highly stress up over loads of thingy and Im currently very tired of it...
*Hint hint*
All I needed was someone whom would keep me grounded, sane and happy... Isn't very difficult uhh?? But it seems damn it difficult... :{To be honest, there's too much to beckons... *Wry smiles*
In the mist of being real stress up, Im happy that Im still able to be positive and looking forward for the coming days... Exams are just very near and I've no time to waste it...
Keeping myself busy is what I can do right now at this wistful moments, I've been thinking quite a lil' bit of what I shall do now... I guess I gotta stick with my plan... *Sly smiles*
I hope everything will rest now and I need peace...
Apparently, the mood swing don't seem to be getting away, it's irritates me loads... Is due to the month or my six sense is making me seem real woozy/wistful... Either way you look at it...! *Laughs*
More over, my six sense is delivering those not very pleasant scene to me. But I hope that this time round my six sense would not be accurate... Yes, I'm quite worried about my examinations result, which will release one month from today... I even dreamt that I need to take supplementary paper... *Sigh* Isn't very good to have "afternoon mares"... I admit I went to have my afternoon nap at 12pm when I came back from my breakfast, I was napping till about 2.30pm after which I smsed my darling...
At this point in time, I really feel very helpless, I have no idea where am I heading too... I guess all I need to be now is to stay optimistic and positive and that's what really helps at times... Constantly/instantly there's all my nice dearies darling seeing me through my ups/downs.. I feel much better after the conversation I had with Darling Jennifer over sms-es.... In the mist, of her examination days she didn't fail to lend me a good pair of ears whenever I needed, she offer me piles of advices and she's my tissues giver.. Her most honest opinions leads me to a better world...
Oh well... Not forgetting one of my bestie guy-friend Eric, thanks so much for the sms-es chat few days backs... Yes, this guy-friend was once my manager come colleague which we are the very best friend... Indeed, sms-ing him with all my problems, he did help me loads in my life journey, yes he might be busy at times, but he will make an effort to text me whenever he is free... I guess, many dearies friends of mine, has seen a very"down side of me", whenever I'm in trouble...They have always been my confidant, my pillar of support and my tissue giver whenever we cry over stuff...
I really *hearts* them loads... I guess, without those help from them I wouldn't stand still today, indeed they did a good job in pulling me back from my "down moments"... I know words can't express how much I appreciate them, but they'll never lead my mind and heart... I give credit to them...
Many attempts, I wanted to give up but all this dearies friends of mine never allow me to do any hasty action or decision. They guide me along my learning journey, and makes me what I'm today, a lil' girl who is less wary and less barren. Yes, I always said, isn't easy to walk through those obstacles but no matter what upholds we have to learn to overcome the fear and finish those obstacles that are set for us. No point looking backwards, as the obstacles had happen we must finish it and after which, we look back with a smiles and everything is worth our struggle.
Technically, I hope that things will goes smooth of me and everyone of there... Blogging this down, makes me feel real very emotional, yes I ought to know that I'm still putting smiles on my face but deep down inside my heart I'm feeling weak. I hope that I could just sleep through all those problems that are occurring next week. I admit, from next week onwards will be a real stressful and tedious week till the end of my course. But never the less, there's friends who will just clown around and act all silly and goofy to make me smile...*Wrinks* I'm emboldened by all my dearies friends and darling smile. *sly smiles*
Alrighty, I shall end if not my emo feelings cannot be control anymore...
♥ Guess Wallet.
♥ My Titus Watches
♥ NIKE Water Bottle
♥ Sony Ericsson C903
♥ Sony Ericsson K770i.
♥ Samsung T10 MP3.
♥ White Killer Spec.
♥ Computer
♥ My Bed.
♥ Pink and White Stuff.
♥ Baby Love
♥ Bestie Jennifer
♥ Dr Janice
♥ Mummy Dearest
♥ Da Jie
♥ Youngest Brother
♥ Maternal Grandparents
♥ All My Close/Good Friends
Her Cravings
♥ New JOB
♥ Driving License
♥ More Clothing
♥ More Accessories.
♥ Heels.
♥ Sony Camera
♥ Lappy
♥ Overseas Holiday
